How Do You Spell “False Dichotomy”? (Updated)

A friend at work recently sent me the following email, which I’m sure has been bouncing around the ether for years and doubtless surfaces during the home stretch of every presidential campaign cycle:

As I was talking to this little girl Catherine, the daughter of some friends, she said she wanted to be President some day.

Both of her parents, liberal Democrats, were standing there with us - and I asked Catherine – “If you were President what would be the first thing you would do?”

Catherine replied – “I would give houses to all the homeless people.”

“Wow – what a worthy goal you have there, Catherine.”  I told her,”You don’t have to wait until you’re President to help the homeless, you can come over to my house and clean up all the dog poop in my back yard and I will pay you $5 dollars. Then we can go over to the grocery store where the homeless guy hangs out, and you can give him the $5 dollars to put toward a new house.”

Catherine (who was about 4) thought that over for a second, while her mom looked at me seething, and Catherine replied, “Why doesn’t the homeless guy come over and clean up the dog poop and you can just pay him the $5 dollars?”

And I said, “Welcome to the Republican Party.”

<Sigh>

Ah, for the heady days in these United States when that were true!  When the Democrats were for the people, and the Republicans were for the… other people.

Instead, now, we are forced to choose between the National Socialists on the one hand, and the International Socialists on the other hand.  Compelled to choose between being shot, or being stabbed.

It kind of tickles me to note the belligerence between the donkey factionists and the elephant factionists.  I keep thinking, “Silly rabbits!  We live under a one-party rule!”

I mean, seriously, what is it that makes people think there is a dime’s difference between the Republicrats and the Demoblicans?  Two of the guys in my office cube farm are desperately Democrat, while the balance are pretty monolithically rabidly Republican.  The younger of the two — by 30 years or so — is a Democrat solely by virtue of the fact that he hails from the Boston, MA, area, and doesn’t realize there are more Senators in DC than Edward “Drivin’ and Divin’” Kennedy, so I try to broaden his political perspective anytime the opportunity presents itself.

The fact is, both Republicans and Democrats in national office desire one thing and one thing only:  power.  This does not make any of them evil or especially despicable; it in fact separates them from their predecessors and contemporaries, in our history and that of other nations not at all.  The history of Man is the history of unsavory megalomaniacs trying to bilk and/or subjugate regular folk.

There is no lie they will not tell in pursuit of power (tho’ they will change their rhetoric to suit their audiences).  “The power to what?” you may ask.  My answer:  the power to nothing — the power to have power.

[I began writing this post on a couple days ago.  This will teach me to wait around and put off publishing posts:  Ron Paul has upstaged me.  Now, my worldwide readership (both of you) will likely think I'm just jumping on the "third party or bust" bandwagon.  I am not, and offer this as proof.]

UPDATE:

Click here to watch Dr Paul’s press conference.